(no subject)

[technoir]

Home is where the heart is or so they say. In truth home is where the hole is. I go home, climb in the hole and pull the lid closed. I am safe and naked there.

When I go out it is time for the armor. Layers of protection to keep me safe from slings and arrows. I have taken arms but never defeat them.

A hermit in a crowd, I stand in my cave watching the world pass me by. Comprehending it all like the reclusive holy man, but never can I really join the show. Vows to keep and all that jazz.

But let not this hermit not entertain. Let my shadow puppets dance and play for your delight. See how I tumble and twirl. Laugh along if for no other reason than the illussion that I am really here.

enough ramblings for this. I will no doubt let my pity be a deluge later by enough now. Back to the show.

Pass The popcorn.

TechNoir
Slaying my own unicorns

Comments

Take a deep breath...

[pleroma.livejournal.com]

...and realize that most all of the defense mechanisms that people have up really accomplish nothing except for keeping people at a distance. I am who I am with almost everyone I meet. No walls - whatcha see is whatcha get (expect for psychically which is a different matter), but when it comes down to the real me - that's pretty much what people deal with from day to day.

I realized that if someone says something negative about me, then I shrug off the pain of it, think over what they said (was there truth to it or were they just bein' a jerk/bitch) and then deal with accordingly. If they were saying something painfully honest, I need to see if it works for me or hinders me (my issue). Or if it is crap, well...it is crap. So, buck up little camper and be as strong as that guy Saul that we've heard about. Just don't die as much.

;)

Re: Take a deep breath...

[technoir.livejournal.com]

Being alone is a cage at times. you get used to it. You grow comfortable with it. It is your reality. But when you want to change that it is not so easy. I have been less frightened by the guns I have had pulled on me than the possibility of letting someoe in my world, much less inviting them. As to being like Saul, it would be easier to be that reckless.

TechNoir